I just had my check in for my prayer group and the prayer for today I really liked. When I joined the prayer group a month ago I wasn't sure I would like it. This is because I have never been a bible reader or a formal prayer person. I don't belong to an organized religion nor do I attend church. For so many this would make me a really bad believer, but I believe that god is in everything and is everywhere so why go to church? My faith is tied to something stronger than a place, it is something so many don't understand but I don't think they need to. After all it is my faith isn't it???
I have begun to LOVE my prayer group. I love that I get support and that I can ask for help through it. I love that the girls on there don't care what fraction of Christianity I belong to and that hopefully they all respect my personal choices and beliefs. Most of all I am thankful for them because they are the only people in my life I can talk to about God and faith. Recently I have understood the need for Churches and organized religion because in hard times it is so nice to have people around you who believe in what you believe.
I have been thinking about going to church recently. I used to go once a month as a young teen either with friends or with my grandparents who are devote Greek Orthodox. I haven't yet decided on where I will go but I do know of a few places that might be nice. I have no idea how I am going to tell R about this idea. He will most likely flip a lid but I feel the need to be around others like me. Others with faith.
Here is today's prayer:
Lord, Calm my heart today. Reassure me with Your peace and understanding. This road seems so long and so painful. But I am strong through You. Help me to find You through my tears and wait with You until I am ready to pick myself up and continue on down my path with dignity and honor, Knowing that You are my Father and that you walk right next to me. I can't understand the reason behind this suffering, I try but the only comfort I find is knowing that You won't ever leave me alone.
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In ttc news I am 18dpo and no AF yet. hmmmmmm........
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